War doesn’t determine who wins;only who’s left.
Forgive me for my previous posts, but those do not lead me to the point of hatred.
Forgive me for pretending to be blind. Indeed, I saw the line drawn. But I still crossed it.
I took the chance to be something I won’t be able to be.
Who drew the line?
Why was there a barrier?
I don’t know. I really don’t.
Perhaps I’m too close for comfort.
Too complete a package.
That makes me look uninteresting.
Unbeautiful.
Absence of sparks to ignite a fire.
Unworthy to be a best friend.
Not even a friend.
Too aggresive?
Too demanding?
Too clingy?
All of above? I bet.
Indeed, the end has blown. But the only difference is, you’ve been waiting for it. And I didn’t.
Don’t hang up.
Can we talk?
So confused
It’s like im lost.
What went wrong?
what made you go?
Don’t pretend you don’t know
This is me
Im unchangeable..
When did we
Fall apart?
Or did you lie
From the start?
When you said
Its only you
I was blind
Such a fool
Thinking we
Were unbreakable..
It was you and me against the world
And you promised me forever more
Was it something that I said?
was it something that I did?
Cuz I gotta know
What made me unbeautiful.
Ive been told
Whats done is done
To let it go
And carry on
And deep inside
I know that’s true
Im stuck in time
Im stuck on you
We were still untouchable…
It was you and me against the world
And you promised me forever more
Was it something that I said?
Was it something that I did?
Cuz I gotta know
What made me unbeautiful…
Without love or hatred,
Siti Nur Fazilah. =)
Satu hari nanti, Insya Allah..
Satu hati nanti kau akan mengerti barangkali langit tu tinggi atau rendah.
Satu hari nanti kau akan sedar tiada sesiapa yang mampu menggantiku.
Satu hari nanti kau akan sedar bahawa apa yang telah ku lakukan tiada siapa yang dapat tanding.
Satu hari nanti kau akan kesal dengan keputusan yang kau ambil.
Satu hari nanti kau akan makan kata-kata kau sendiri.
Satu hari nanti kau akan rasa dan lalui apa aku rasa dan lalui.
Satu hari nanti kau akan sedar tiada siapa yang dapat menerimamu sebagaimana aku menerima dirimu.
Satu hari nanti kau tidak akan jumpa orang seperti aku.
Satu hari nanti kau akan mengimbas kembali kenangan kita.
Satu hari nanti kau akan menatap gambar kita dan terus merenung.
Satu hari nanti kau akan gugurkan airmata kerana memutuskan jambatan menghubungkan kita.
Satu hari nanti jika kau kembali,aku berjanji tidak akan menerimamu sampai akhir hayatku.
Percayalah. Berulang kali perkara di atas telah berlaku di sekelilingku. Aku harapkan yang terbaik. Yang terbaik bukan kau yang menentukan. Hanya Allah yang berkuasa.
Long and winding road..
‘In the name of Allah’
The same bus service- First Coach. Accept that we reached there 15 minutes before boarding. Bangsar- the same venue. Accept that this time the cab fare is lesser than usual. And this time, I went back with my roomate. And this one tall gorgeous Eurasian guy sat a couple of sits from mine. I call that an eye therapy. *GRIN* 5 hours journey and I sat wishing to be home sooner than expected. A smile is craved upon reaching Singapore. I was welcomed by the pretty moon. The moon reminded me of the beautiful things I’m having and I once had. I reached Novena Square around 11pm. I had a hard time waiting for cab alone-the same old thing. The last thing I did was falling asleep.
Woke up in the noon today. Checked my study table. Browing notebooks. Opened the one Atiqah bought for me on my 12th birthday which I used it last year. Saw love noted from friends,poetry from Farahin, registration for ALevels,William Shakespeare’s Sonnet Number Twelve,more poetries, Malay literature,lyrics, Prefects meeting minutes which was supposed to be typed but I didn’t,GP stuffs,Usul Fiqh,scribbles and folded pages written: DO NOT READ. The folded paged caught my eyes. I opened the scotchtapes. Oh it was a conversation.
First person: It feels like u gave hopes.False hopes. I don’t know.
Second person: Dulu I pernah ckp dgn u, i’m sorry kalau i mcm gitu. i taknk hilang kwn i .
FP: Papepn,it makes no different. I ade ke takde ke. no diff kan? i’m just lyk a pasing pt. dun weri, u’ll find someone way better than me.u still haf many by ur side who care for u more than i do.
SP: u mmg.. suke ckp gitu.. pada mata u, i gtu kan.. takpe.u tak phm.
FP: aah.. camne i nak phm> kalau tak terangkan? u pon g2 pe..
SP: I’m not like tat lar gurl. Kalau terpaksa lyn u buat pe i nak susah msg u lama2. I can cut it short all tis while ryte. slow la u .haha
FP:ntah.u nvr noe wat.
SP: U r a gd girl..
FP: I noe.u dun haf to remind me.
SP:ur a great gurl.
FP: I noe ppl tell me tat all the time.
SP: yelar2..
FP: Oh.. sal tak mintak number? haiz terlepas peluang. tak menyesal?
SP: tak lor.dah ade sorg kawan yang baik dah cukup.
FP: Oh sape? tk blg pun?
SP: you.
If I could lie, my lie will be claiming that I don’t remember this conversation. As I ran through the conversation, I found myself smiling. Perhaps I’m too happy to reminisce it. Kept smiling without realizing the tears are already near my chin. Okay gotta go. Chiaowz.
‘HE knows the best’
sitinurfazilah <3
Puteri.. =)
Jika dunia
Aku yang punya
Akan ku dirikan
Sebuah syurga
Malam tanpa siang
Untuk ku bermimpi
Sepanjang masa
Tanpa kecewa
Bertemankan bintang yang setia
Bagaikan puteri
Kisah khayalan
Yang hidupnya suci dan sempurna
Tapi sayang
Hanyalah impian
Bulan tak bisa tumbuh ditaman
Dan bila mentari datang
Pulanglah segala kenyataan
Jika dunia
Aku yang punya
Akan kuhiaskan
Sepasang sayap
Putih dan berseri
Untukku kemudi
Go.
I wake up in the morning and I’m thinking of you.
Believe me you got me thinking I’ve got something to lose
I gave you everything I got and in return
You pull away and there is a distance I don’t deserve
What happened to friendship?
What happened to trust?
We went separate ways
And somewhere in the middle was us..
I’ve gotta say something
I’m first to the phone
I wanna be with you
It’s better now
You can go..
I don’t understand
Why you pull away your hand
But i’ts happened too many times
I don’t wanna care
Bout your love if love is there
But the heart you’re about to break is mine
So it’s better that you
Go, go go go boy go boy just go
I said it’s better that you
Go go go go boy go boy please go
So it’s better that you
I’m not trying to play .It’s not like that.
I ain’t trying the game .To win you back, no.
Thought we had something like
Just what I wanted
Everything I needed
Boy you completed me
But that’s the problem,
And I don’t know how to solve it..
I have to tell you something might upset you
You know I loved ever since I met you
But you got me troubled and I’m sick ’cause you don’t want to
And now I feel ashamed
Cause I just have to say
Go ahead boy walk away
Go ahead ’cause can’t say just what I’m feeling when I’m next to you..
O__0
Round of applause to the
biggest fool in the world.
Standing Ovation
congratulation
Damn I was down for it
gave you my heart and all you did was pound on it.
Do or die. You’re still a corpse. Or I am.
Sometimes I get the feeling
He’s watching over me
And other times I feel like I should go
And through it all, the rise and fall
The bodies in the streets
And when you’re gone I want you to know
I’ll carry on, I’ll carry on
And though you’re dead and gone, believe me
Your memory will carry on, we’ll carry on
And in my heart, I can’t contain it
The anthem won’t explain it
And while that sends you reeling
From decimated dreams
My misery and hate will kill u
So paint it black and take it back
Let’s shout out loud and clear
Do you fight it to the end?
You’re broken and defeated
I’m like aweary widow marches on
On and on I carry through the fears
Disappointed faces of my peers
Take a look at me
‘Cause I could not care at all
Do or die, you’ll never make me
Because the world will never take my heart
Though you try, you’ll never break me
I want it all, I wanna play this part
Won’t explain or say I’m sorry
I’m unashamed, I’m gonna show my scar
Give a cheer for all the broken
Listen here, because it’s only
I’m just a human, I’m not a hero
and I don’t care!
berhenti berharap.
aku tak percaya lagi
dengan apa yang kau beri
aku terdampar di sini
tersudut menunggu mati
aku tak percaya lagi
akan guna matahari
dengan mampu menerangi
sudut gelap hati ini
aku berhenti berharap
dan menunggu datang gelap
sampai nanti suatu saat
tak ada cinta kudapat
kenapa ada derita
bila bahagia tercipta
kenapa ada sang hitam
bila putih menyenangkan…
aku pulang…
tanpa dendam
kuterima kekalahanku
aku pulang…
tanpa dendam
kusalutkan kemenanganmu
kau ajarkan aku bahagia
kau ajarkan aku derita
kau tunjukkan aku bahagia
kau tunjukkan aku derita
kau berikan aku bahagia
kau berikan aku derita
maafkan saye.. saya tahu awak tak pernah sayang saya.walaupun sebagai kawan.. maafkan saye sebab saye sayang awak. saye tulus sayang awak.kalau awak bute,saye sanggup kasi awak mate saye.kelakar kan wak? tapi insya Allah ianya benar. =) saya sedar awak dah lepaskan saye.dari care awak sekarang.saya faham.tapi hakikatnya saya memang susah nak terima.susah nak lupekan awk..saye tahu awak nak saye buat perkara yang same.Insya Allah saye akan buat perkara yang same.Tapi mudah-mudahan ianya keranaNYA.awak, kalau awak dah jumpe yang terbaik, jangan berpaling arah lagi ye? saya sentiasa do’akan yang terbaik untuk awak.selalu wak.. =) kalau awak bahagia, saya pun nak tumpang bersama. bolehkan? saya sayang awak tau.sebagai sahabat.kalau tu tak keterlaluan.*mengeluh* satu benda je saye tak tahu.tak tahu macam mana nak cakap selamat tinggal pat awak.. 
ya questioned did i care.u could ask anyone i even said YOU WERE MY GREAT ONE.
